WHAT YOU SHOULD DO:
- Stay with us and keep calm.
The last thing we need when we’re panicking, is to have someone else panicking with us.
- Offer medicine if we usually take it during an attack.
You might have to ask whether or not we take medicine- heck, some might not; but please, ask. It really helps.
- Move us to a quiet place.
We need time to think, to breathe. Being surrounded by people isn’t going to help.
- Don’t make assumptions about what we need. Ask.
We’ll tell you what we need. Sometimes; you may have to ask- but never assume.
- Speak to us in short, simple sentences.
- Be predictable. Avoid surprises.
- Help slow our breathing by breathing us or by counting slowly to 10.
As odd as it sounds, it works.WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T DO:
1. Say, “You have nothing to be panicked about.”
We know. We know. We know. And because we know we have nothing to be panicked about, we panic even more. When I realize that my anxiety is unfounded, I panic even more because then I feel like I’m not in touch with reality. It’s unsettling. Scary.
Most of the time, a panic attack is irrational. Sometimes they stem from circumstances — a certain couch triggers a bad memory or being on an airplane makes you claustrophobic or a break up causes you to flip your lid — but mostly, the reasons I’m panicking are complex, hard to articulate or simply, unknown. I could tell myself all day that I have no reason to be having a panic attack and I would still be panicking. Sometimes, because I’m a perfectionist, I become even more overwhelmed when I think my behaviour is “unacceptable” (as I often believe it is when I’m panicking). I know it’s all in my mind, but my mind can be a pretty dark and scary place when it gets going.
Alternate suggestion: Say, “I understand you’re upset. It is okay. You have a right to be upset and I am here to help.”
2. Say, “Calm down.”
This reminds me of a MadTV sketch where Bob Newhart plays a therapist who tells his patients to simply “Stop it!” whenever they express anxiety or fear. As a sketch, it’s funny. In real life, it’s one of the worst things you can do to someone having a panic attack. When someone tells me to “stop panicking” or to “calm down,” I just think, “Oh, okay. I haven’t tried that one. Hold on, let me get out a pen and paper and jot that down, you jerk.”
Instead of taking action so that they do relax, simply telling a panicking person to “calm down” or “stop it” does nothing. No-thing.
Alternate suggestion: The best thing to do is to listen and support. In order to calm them down without the generalities, counting helps.
3. Say, “I’m just going to leave you alone for a minute.”
Being left alone while panicking makes my heart race even harder. The last thing I want is to be left by myself with my troubled brain. Many of my panic attacks spark from over-thinking and it’s helpful to have another person with me, not only for medical reasons (in case I pass out or need water) but also it’s helpful to have another person around to force me to think about something other than the noise in my head.
Alternate suggestion: It sometimes helps me if the person I’m with distracts me by telling me a story or sings to me. I need to get out of my own head and think about something other than my own panic.
4. Say, “You’re overreacting.”
Here’s the thing: I’m not. Panic attacks might be in my head, but I’m in actual physical pain. If you’d cut open your leg, no one would be telling you you’re overreacting. It’s a common trope in mental health to diminish the feelings or experience of someone suffering from anxiety or panic because there’s no visible physical ailment and because there’s no discernible reason for the person to be having such a strong fear reaction.
The worst thing you can tell someone who is panicking is that they are overreacting.
Alternate suggestion: Treat a panic attack like any other medical emergency. Listen to what the person is telling you. Get them water if they need it. It helps me if someone rubs my back a little. If you’re in over your head, don’t hesitate to call 911 (or whatever the emergency services number is where you are). But please, take the person seriously. Mental health deserves the same respect as physical health.
German Shepherds and their little floppy ears. There is nothing I do not like about this.
HOW TO CHEER UP IN 2 EASY STEPS
- WHISPER “BEEP BOOP” TO YOURSELF.
- REPEAT UNTIL NOT SAD.
((BUT WHY DOES THIS WORK??????))
- Ask me questions
- Make me choose between two things
- Ask me my “top 5” of anything
- Send me “would you rather’s”
- Send me “Fuck, Marry, Kill”
- Tell me stories
- Tell me about your day
- Anonymously confess things
- Ask for advice
- Everything goes
- Everything will be answered (posted)
See, this is a difficult question not because I think any of them wouldn’t but because I think they all definitely would.
Enjolras shows up in a temper because someone was abusing a baby goat and who does things like that and raging about the injustices of animal abuse while cuddling the baby.
Combeferre is goat-sitting and enthuses about the many and varied uses for goats and has his goat litter-trained and thus figures he may as well bring it out to get socialized.
Courfeyrac confiscated the kid because it was being held as evidence at the police station or something and it was bleating and really, Enjolras, what was he supposed to do, leave it there?
One of Feuilly’s neighbors had the goat but couldn’t take care of it anymore, so he took it in, and it’s still young enough to need frequent feeding, so he brings it to the meeting.
Jehan turns up with the goat following at his heels, announces he’s named it Eurydice because it followed him out of hell, and declines to explain further. When Combeferre points out it is a boy goat he only gets a withering look in response.
Joly and Bossuet turn up with a goat, Bossuet’s arm in a sling, and about six bags full of potential goat foods Joly wants to try. Both of them look very shifty. They all decide it is probably best not to ask.
Bahorel met this dude with a baller goat, and the dude was totally an asshole, so he punched him out and took the goat. The goat’s name is Rex. Like T. Rex, Enjolras, cool it, I’m not indoctrinating my goat into the monarchy.
Some model for one of Grantaire’s art classes came with a goat because they thought it would make for a good ~pastoral painting~ or something, and then left the goat there, so Grantaire shrugged and brought it with him. It’s named Bottle. Shut up, Courfeyrac, that’s a totally legit goat name.
Marius does not know why this goat is following him will someone please help him and stop giggling and taking pictures :(((((
Reblogging this in hopes that someone will illustrate it.
Marius always exceeds my expectations.
#marius you’re late#what’s wrong today?#you look as if you’ve seen a goat#some wine and say what’s going on#a goat you say#a goat may be#someone left this goat by me#oh how i wish that it was gone (via)
the notebook problem: you see a notebook. you want to buy the notebook. but you know you have like TEN OTHER NOTEBOOKS. most which are STILL EMPTY. you don’t need to notebook. you’re probably not gonna use the notebook anyway. what’s the point? DONT BUY THE NOTEBOOK. you buy the notebook.
Polish doctor that refused to perform abortion named a “hero”
Dr Bogdan Chazan was visited by an expecting mother (32 weeks into pregnancy), who already had 5 miscarriages before and was worried about her health. It turned out that the fetus had hydrocephalus, undeveloped brain and was missing many bones from its skull. The Doctor refused to perform an abortion and didn’t send the woman to another hospital which could do so (according to polish law, if a doctor doesn’t want to perform an abortion, he has to choose another hospital which will agree to do so). Chazan was named a “local hero” and “true warrior of Jesus in the name of life of the unborn” by many polish politicians and catholic activists. He used conscience clause as an excuse for his actions.
The woman gave birth to the child through a C-section. She and her husband spent 10 painful days watching their deformed child die a horrible death. When she finally decided to speak out, she said:
“During these 10 days, no priest, no pro life activist or even dr Chazan came to see the child, to ask if they can help. It was really hard to look at our child. We knew what was coming, but it was still very hard to cope with”
Congratulations, pro-lifers - another “life” saved, another “happy” child and “happy” family.